We are people, too!

I was talking with a super cool, hip dietitian from Wisconsin the other day about what she makes at home for dinner and then she said "I would be afraid to cook for a chef." 

We like to be fed, too! 

Now, I'm only speaking for myself but it's nice for someone to cook for me once in awhile. I'm sure a mechanic would love for someone to change their oil on their car from time to time so they can sit back and relax. Even though I love to cook and it's a great passion of mine, it's nice to not to do it when I get home. 

Many people are afraid of cooking for professional chefs because they are afraid of judgement. They are afraid the chef will judge their food and not like it. And that is probably true. BUT we do not judge because we want to put you down or make you feel like shit. We judge because that's what we are taught to do. We're taught to serve the best product we can serve. And how do we better ourselves? Constructive criticism. Don't get me wrong, if you invite me over for dinner I'm not going to tell you your chicken is dry (because it probably is). There's a difference between food that is offered to me and food that I am paying for. If I'm paying for a meal I do have a higher standard for that meal (depending on the restaurant) but the standard is obviously not as high when I eat over a friend's house. 

For the foodies. Please do me a favor. I know you like food and you like to cook and all that jazz. But if you're going to invite a chef over for dinner please understand what will happen if you ask "So how's the food?" I will give you my most honest opinion and that may or may not hurt your feelings. So if you're sensitive, keep your mouth shut. I have definitely ruined some dinners because of that question but I do not feel bad because it was an honest answer to their question. 

A lot of people always ask me why I have to be so mean. If you know me, I'm all about tough love. I want you to succeed but I'm not going to sugar coat anything. If you make a dish and it tastes like shit I'm going to tell you, not just because it tastes like shit but because it's a reflection of me. If I tell you it tastes good and you make it for someone else and you tell that person, "Chris said it tastes great!" I'm going to look like an asshole. I do not want that to happen. My brother in-law always gets on me because I used to tell my sister her cooking was either shit or OK. But luckily for him she's gotten much better.

I will only voice my opinion on bad food if you ask me but I will ALWAYS tell you if I think the food is good. And if I say the word "delicious" then I am absolutely happy with the meal. I think people should ask for opinions more often. Don't settle for mediocre. Always try to better yourself. Food is a huge representation of you and your drive to be better. So if you ever need some opinions, CALL ME! I'm always hungry!

-bien manger

Go big or go home!

You know what really irks me? Putting a product on your menu just because it's a "rare" or an "exotic" item. That's all fine and dandy but if you're going to serve it, don't cheat the customer by serving a shitty product. 

If you saw a 12oz Kobe Beef Sirloin on the menu and it was only $20 you should be concerned. But this post is not about Kobe Beef, it's not even about how much it was. It's about being true to the ingredients and having some respect for yourself as a chef. 

The other night my girlfriend and I went out to dinner to a place that was known for their game proteins. Kangaroo, alligator, venison, etc. Now, one thing I did expect was the proteins were going to be dry. Most gamey proteins are very lean in general so moisture was not the name of the game. For appetizers she ordered Foire Gras over Heirloom Tomatoes and some type of dressing and I ordered the Grilled Octopus with melon wrapped in some type of cured meat. The only thing I liked about the two dishes was the melon, cantaloupe to be exact. The Foie Gras was seared nicely but the texture was very mushy, almost like an undercooked custard. Foie Gras is given 3 grades - A, B or C. A is the best, it's the fullest, most firm and has no blemishes. And I'm sure you can guess they get worse. I'm guessing they served us a C grade foie because it was so soft. It was served over half a less than 1/4" sliced heirloom tomato. Did I mention it was the bottom of the tomato? Now, you may be thinking "What's wrong with the bottom of the tomato?" Nothing, but if you're trying to offer a fine dining experience w white table cloth and servers with crumbers, you do not serve the bottom or top of tomatoes. Those are for stock.  The dressing tasted like balsamic and oil. 

Now, for the Octopus. I learned through my years of cooking when you cook invertebrates, you either cook it for 90 seconds or 90 minutes. Squid and octopus can become rubber very quickly as I'm sure you've all experienced here and there when ordering calamari. Well, this octopus was definitely grilled and wasn't tough, but wasn't tender. It was grainy, as if it was frozen, defrosted, frozen, defrosted, frozen and defrosted again. Everytime you defrost something it loses moisture and I've had octopus hat was frozen before. What I ate the other night was something else. I attached a picture below to show what I'm talking about. 

This post is not even about me being a pompous fuck who has to have perfect food all the time. It's actually for the people who want to venture into "nicer" foods. If someone wanted to try foie gras for the first time, I would want them to eat the best foie gras there is so they can make their own assessment about the product. It's kind of like someone who wants to try venison for the first time and gets served a well done piece of venison tenderloin from a deer who eats grass from the highway. They're going to think all venison is dry as shit and tastes like shit. 

Cooks, take some pride in your work. We work long hours, we endure constant pain and we get paid shitty. Show everybody why you became a cook and why all this pain is worth it. For me, it's when someone closes their eyes and sighs after taking the first bite of my food.  That's better than a paycheck.

-bien manger